This article was written by Moe Ari Brown, Hinge’s Love and Connection Expert, then edited for publication by DMARGE’s resident Wellness Editor.
When you think about basic survival needs, most people think about food and water. This year, the World Health Organization declared loneliness to be a pressing global health threat, identifying connection with others as crucial not only for our mental health but our physical health too.
Christmas is the perfect time for love and connection, but that doesn’t have to mean romantic connections. If you’re single this festive season, focus on connections with friends and family. You can use this time to figure yourself out and think about what you want from a romantic partner so you can head into 2024 all clued up on exactly what you’re looking for. At Hinge, we call this intentional dating…
Below are my top tips for single Aussies to help them seek out the connections they want this festive season so they’re not only surviving but thriving.
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How To Create Connections This Christmas If You’re…
The only single person at a Christmas party: Instead of seeing this as a negative, see it as an opportunity to meet new people and expand your social circle. If the idea of going by yourself is overwhelming, take a friend or family member with you who is a great social companion and will help you navigate the party easily.
Navigating a new city: If you’re in a new city, the festive season is a great time to explore and create more connections — romantic or otherwise! There are heaps of online event sources in Australia built for this very purpose and it can be a great way to participate in festive fun while meeting new people.
Working through the holidays: Map out the days you have a break during work and make sure you fill them with activities you can enjoy with others. Why not host some friends for a BBQ one Friday night or watch Christmas-themed movies with another loved one?
How To Deal With Social Burnout
If you feel overwhelmed with festive gatherings and social commitments — especially those family parties where every relative asks if you’re still single — here are some tips to help you take care of yourself:
Set boundaries: Outside of traditions that you need to participate in, it’s important to set boundaries. That doesn’t mean you have to say “no” to every event that isn’t on your priority list. However, you can have boundaries around how many other events you will say “yes” to and how much time you can reasonably spend at each function without contributing to your burnout.
Recharge: When you’re feeling burnt out, it’s essential to fill up your social cup by indulging in activities that help you recharge. Be mindful of not escaping or distracting yourself with activities that don’t charge your social battery.
How To Let Go Of Single-Christmas Embarrassment
Acknowledge your feelings: For anyone feeling lonely this Christmas, I want you to know that your experience is not wrong; your experience is real. I encourage you not to judge your experience or feel that you “should” feel any other way. Loneliness is a sign that you desire something… but you may not know how to create that connection.
Accept that you feel lonely: It’s okay to feel this way. Look to understand that it’s showing up to tell you you want more connection this Christmas. Once you know that loneliness is trying to communicate a desire for togetherness, you can create a connection that honours your desires this holiday season.
Create new Christmas traditions: If you don’t have any family or friends nearby, you can create your own traditions. This could involve watching your favourite Christmas movies, baking your favourite Christmas treats, or volunteering your time to help others.
Remember, feelings of loneliness can feel more intense during the festive season. There is often a stark difference between the expectation of how the Christmas season should be and how it actually pans out. For many, it can bring up sadness about relatives who are no longer with us, the end of romantic partnerships, the loss of children, changes in health, new living situations, and more.
All of these emotions can result in people feeling lonely, regardless of the relationships in their lives, and this is totally normal. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others and use this time to get intentional about how you’re feeling.